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5 Fears Travelling As A Lesbian Couple

5 Fears Travelling As A Lesbian Couple

It’s normal to be apprehensive before embarking on an around the world trip. We naturally worry about the unknown. Especially if you are travelling as a lesbian couple.

For everyone and anyone the world can be a scary place. I think I am safe to assume that most women can carry a heavier baggage of fear when they travel. Travelling as a couple can also bring a new set of worries too. But what if we combine this with being a Lesbian couple, I think the rucksack gets a bit bulkier.

My girlfriend and I are embarking on a trip around the world. We’ve already spent the last 7 months in Australia, even though same sex marriage isn’t yet legalised I personally view the UK and Australia as quite similar in regards to gay rights.

But soon we will be heading further afield into South East Asia and South America.

To be honest I don’t know what to really expect, not only in regards to gay rights, but also societal attitudes too. I’m sure we will be meeting people from all corners of the world, so even if we are in a country that supports LGBT people that still might not mean that we won’t face any prejudices from fellow travellers (and that’s pretty scary sometimes).

I wanted to list a few of my fears/worries as a Lesbian couple travelling the world; hopefully it may inspire other LGBT couples and show we all have similar fears no matter if we are LGBT or not. And then I can look back and see how my worries have changed as I gain more travel experience.

1: Not meeting other Lesbian couples or any LGBT people at all

Part of the reason I wanted to go travelling was to meet different people, build my confidence and to be able to deal with different or even difficult situations. You may think a Lesbian wanting to meet other Lesbians, what’s the point in that; the whole reason is to meet different people. But LGBT people are not all the same we are different like everyone else, we speak different languages, have different cultures, have different interests, I just think it would be great to have some common ground with another couple who may understand our situation too.

2: Safety

Unless you are some kind of bionic woman who doesn’t care less about their safety, I’m sure the worry of being assaulted has crossed your mind. Maybe you are travelling alone or with a friend. Just being a woman sometimes makes you feel more vulnerable.

Some boys (because a man wouldn’t act like this) don’t seem to take lesbian relationships seriously. It’s not for your amusement and it doesn’t give you an invitation to be inappropriate. Of course some guys are normal like-minded people, but now and again you meet a d**khead.

3: Arguing

Every couple argues and we are no different. Spending so much time together can put a strain on the strongest of relationships. We are going to be in situations where things don’t always go to plan and that may cause stress levels to sky rocket.

4: The sleeping arrangements

I’m used to sleeping beside my girlfriend. Maybe it is off putting or will draw unwanted attention if we sleep in the same bed. We are probably just going to just take it as it comes. Sometimes it will probably be much cooler to sleep in separate beds, but I don’t think there should be any reason why we shouldn’t feel like we can sleep together if we feel like we want a cuddle.

On a few occasions when we were travelling to Cairns we booked a private double room. People would look at us strange and double check that was the room we wanted. I didn’t quite understand; I know plenty of people who are friends who happily sleep in each other’s bed. In Sydney we slept in the same bed, we did get a few questions from one of the other travellers in the room. But he was quite polite about it and it became an icebreaker.

5: To come out or not to come out

One thing that came up a lot on other LGBT travel blogs was that we will have to get used to coming out over and over again. I personally thought that once I came out to my friends and family, it was all done and dusted. Apparently not and more so when you are travelling, we will constantly be moving from to place to place meeting new people. But I’m sure there will be lots of people who won’t even blink when we reveal the truth, but the stress of doing so is actually really daunting.

Whether you are LGBT or not we all have worries about the unknown. Leave a comment bellow, share your thoughts and fears. What situations did you worry about before travelling, have your worries changed, has anything completely surprise you? Maybe you have some advice for my Girlfriend and I, I would love to hear from you.

 

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17 Comments

  1. No. 4 is exactly why i started FABbnb.com I was tired of always being asked if we were sure we didn’t want twin beds and feeling like I had to come out everytime I made a private booking. You can check my story under the ‘about’ section of the page if you’re interested.
    Safe travels!

    • Hay thanks for commenting Tasia. I will have to check out this website. It’s definitely a big problem. I’ve heard of people getting two single beds in the end because they don’t feel constable enough to explain.
      Thanks again for commenting and sharing your site!

  2. I’m so sorry you even have to worry about this. I have no advice but I’m really hoping your trip exceeds your expectations and that the people you meet are the kindest and most accepting people you could imagine.

    • Don’t be sorry. Up till now we haven’t had any trouble. I’m very positive that it will exceed my expectations.

      Thanks for you comment and support. Greatly appreciated!

  3. I find just being lgbt means you’re coming out over and over. I wish you safe travels, with little homophobia. That is my fear whenever I leave my home country, let alone the country.

    • Yes definitely. It never ends, your in constant deliberation to whether to come out or not.

      Thank you for commenting and showing your support. What do you write about on your blog? I’ll check it out.

      Thanks again.

  4. Hi Jessie, I’m Filipa and I just launched a website that tries to cover some of the points you covered on your post. I’ve been working in the tourism industry for about 12 years and despite being an area that’s so overcrowded with services there’s still lack on service for the LGBT community. I quit my job to work on this and I’d like to get your feedback, as a traveller, of what you think of it. Still early ages, as we’re mainly focusing on Southern Europe before jumping to more exotic destinations. Take care.

    • It’s a great idea. I’d love some budget backpacker stuff though. A lot of these sites (even though there’s only a few) just seem to be luxury stuff.

  5. George Akerley says

    I think it’d be interesting to all if you’ll discuss how many or how few of your concerns were minimal, and if difficult situations arose, how you managed to settle them. I’m also hopeful that your trip was delightful, even as you faced a bit of difficulty or not.

    • Thanks for commenting. Yes this is definitely something I would like to write about after my trip. Also to compare if my fears were different from reality.

  6. Sally-Anne says

    Go, go, go and keep going ladies! Familiarising the world with, and encouraging people to accept our differences is awesome 😘 😘

  7. Hi there Jessie 🙂
    I looked over your blog and I find it very well made. The colors are friendly, the menu also, and your story is interesting. What I didn’t find is a logo.
    I will follow your posts and I will do what we discussed about, link you in my blog and write things as pluses that I find and your blog and attracted me.
    Kissessss <3

  8. I went travelling as a lone, single gay woman because I wanted to not only challenge my own bias on what I thought the world entailed but to seek common ground with everyone I met. I was surprised over and over again on both accounts. Important to realise also that your encounters and communications with who you meet (and discussions and/or openness on your sexual-identity) linger long in their minds and often change to a more open-minded stance. Most of the time, in my experience, was that your sexual-identity was viewed as a small part of WHO you were, and therefore given less emphasise than we would probably give it ourselves.

    • Hi Ally, great comment. Definitely going to follow up on this post on what travelling was actually like and if any of my fears matched reality.

      Thanks for commenting! 🙂

      • You are very welcome Jessie – i’m keen to read your follow-up when the time is right. Take Care, Ally

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